Gustav

I should have known better.

The Nature Of My Body

That sound you hear, that's the sound of someone realising that sometimes, it's easier to change the world than it is your own life.


(via I Wrote This For You)

Saviour

Thank youuuuuuu. Thank youuuu so much ! You really are my saviour hehe. xx

Close to my heart

Do you remember the time when they played for the first time?

I just called to say I love you
I just called to say how much I care
I just called to say I love you
And I mean it from the bottom of my heart.

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you.

I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
Take me in into your darkest hour
And I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you.

I never make a promise that
I don't intend to keep
So when I say forever,
Forever's what I mean
Well, I'm no Casanova but
I swear this much is true
I'll be holding nothing back
When it comes to you

No one else comes close to you
No one makes me feel the way you do
You're so special girl to me
And you'll always be eternally
Every time I hold you near
You always say the words I love to hear
Girl with just a touch you can do so much
No one else comes close


Let's remember the good times, shall we? I'm Alyaa and today my mood is pretty good :) Tu me manques.

Ronaldo

There's a lot of things that you have to do, that you must do, but first, start with yourself.

Be better.

The Molten Core

This world is hard. It has sharp edges and points that cut. It'll make you choose between love, money and sleep. Choose love each time and sleep when you can, money - only when you must.

Because this world is hard. And at times, it is too hard, for me.

(via I Wrote This For You)

Sadly I'm not a robot

Bila dah semua orang pun, even the ones that mattered, buat macam tu kat you, mana tak sedih kan? Paling paling pun terasa. Terluka. Terkilan.

Nothing but a bunch of fat disappointments.

Stupid girl.

Dr. Horton

Irregardless to whether your friend can make it or not, you should just invite them to your event because a) they are your friend, no? b) it's not like you have a limit of people that you're allowed to invite, unless you do, but I reckon you don't and c) if you think that by not inviting them because you know, or think so well that they cannot make it, would hurt them less, you're wrong. The damage is worse, actually.

The most probable thing to happen is that, when they see all the fun, happy pictures of the said event and realize that almost all of your mutual friends are there except for themselves, they'll feel surprised (and a not good one at it), taken aback, hurt, left out and a tad confused as to why you did not invite them or bother mentioning to them as they had to find out about it through (goddammit) Facebook when it's all over the news.

So basically, what you SHOULD do, or should have done, is to just invite them. Yang lain tu belakang cerita. It's called COURTESY, honey. And sadly, if not unfortunately, you fell short on that.

Web of lies

#1 The difference is, you can do all the shit stuff you wanna do to that person and the other person that reality doesn't allow you. Kan? At least, there, even if it hurts, it's just a dream whereas in reality you can't really go jump off the 24th floor because then you'll be dead. Unless... it's where you really want to be.

#2 If that is how you portray yourself, don't act so surprised and confused when they actually think and say such things about you. It's predictable, and you know it, so you should know better. People see what they wanna see... or they just see what is presented to them. It's just how things work. Don't blame anyone but yourself.

#3 All this hate will get you nowhere. Just let it go. Or you'll end up losing your sanity, and my dear, for such a piece of meat, it is not worth it.

#4 It hurts every time. Every single one of them. It's like being stabbed - you feel the pain, but you just don't die.

Speechless

Just as I thought. I was right.

I'll never talk again
Oh boy you've left me speechless
You've left me speechless, so speechless

And I'll never love again,
Oh boy you've left me speechless
You've left me speechless, so speechless

What's the difference? When both dreams and reality sucks the same and there's really no other place to turn?

Hmm. Sedih pulak dengar lagu Gaga ni.

Stress, potong. Terus.

Relations

Remember the time Barney felt awkward and sad every time he heard Ted and Robin talked about them hooking up to resolve problems? How it was funny and okay to them? Remember how Barney would leave the table every single time so that he could smash some tv to ease the pain?

Remember the time Marshall had the conversation with Barney and Robin about the 'reacher' and 'settler' in a relationship and Marshall went up to confront Lily about it, only to hear Lily say that she's the settler? Remember how he said "HOW could you say that?!" and how hurt, well sorta, he was to know that Lily settled for him?

Remember how Robin cried every time she hears about Barney's latest hook up with some HOT chick? Remember how she said to Barney that, it made her feel as if she was just another number among his other conquests? As if she meant that little?

Been there.

A classic dreamer

I blame romantic comedies, love stories and all things poetic for making me a hopeless romantic. For making me want to have, to experience such things. But then again, even if I didn't heard of these, I would still be one - suppose I take it from the father.

It's not such a bad thing. But it can be a bad thing when it's among the things you always dream of. Even if you dream of it quietly, you know? Cheesy as it may be, that's the way I want it (I would sound like those lines they give you in the movies, no really).

I want my happy ever after - I want a love that will last.

Alyaa memang kuat berangan. Kaki berangan. Takpa lah. Hey, we all want it now, don't we? I just have the balls to say 'em cheesy mushy things. Sue me ;)

Anti-histamin

I do not like taking my meds. Ever. Since I was a kid. I don't know if it's phobia or what (nah, don't think it is) but I just do not like to take my meds. Especially those liquid ones. Ugh antibiotics! Cough syrup! Please lord. What I don't mind taking, however, is a couple of Neurofens to help soothe my PMS or really bad headaches, Zyrtec or Aerius for my sinus problem, and the occasional Vitamin C, Spirulina and Seven Seas cod liver oil capsules cause they don't taste like meds.

Tried to take a Zyrtec yesterday since we ran out of Zyrtec-Ds and I had the gag effect (couldn't swallow) twice! And the pill sort of dissolved slightly on my tongue which caused a bitter taste. The horror. So I had to take some liquid Augmentin just now, and thankfully it wasn't so bad, didn't taste too antibiotic-y like most antibiotics back in the days. I remember barfing right after I took one, a long time ago, and I got quite a scold for it. Tsk. Just my luck. Skipped the cough syrup because... well one is enough for the night.

Now I know you doctors-to-be out there may not agree but at the moment, I am my own doctor. Because going to the doctor will only cost my time, energy, effort and oh yeah, my Mum's money and she/he will give the same old meds that I already have stacked up in our medicine cupboard so let's just skip the chase and do it my own way. Hey, it works. Normally I don't do antibiotics because you have to follow them but today calls for it. I cannot stand having that much green mucus anymore. Please, pardon the language. You may blog skip now if you fancy.

So now the whole family, one by one is down with either flu or fever and poor little baby Rawsyad is down with it too. Poor thing, he's having such a hard time, with the rashes and the tummy aches and now runny nose and high temperature. I hope he'll be better in the morning. Kesian Mama jaga, penat... dia tak henti henti menangis kita dah tak tahu nak buat apa.

I'm waiting for the medicine to kick in - for me to fall asleep. The ones they claim will make me sleepy hardly ever work on me while mocha works better instead. Figures.

So I just played walked talked with Rawsyad and let him chase the shadows and I think the little boy is finally content enough to go to bed. Kesian bila budak kecik tak sihat. Dah lah tak boleh nak cakap. Hmm, payah nak jadi mak nanti ni. If jadi mak la ;)

So yeah. I'm gonna try to sleep. Long day tomorrow. Bank in the morning with Adik and then I have to deal with my essay. Oh essay. Time to call for reinforcements hah hah ha.

Good night everyone.

Augmentin

Had a lovely Eid with friends and family. And even though my baju raya kinda sucked and looked cheap, I had a happy time and oh, wore Mama's old kebaya instead tee hee hee.

Am currently down with flu, sore throat and a big whoop of a tummy. I have tried eating less but it's doing me no good. It's time to hit the treadmill. Run baby run, and throw in 'em crunches too. I wanna get back into shape.

Why did I exercise again some time ago? Oh yes, I was depressed. Really depressed. And so I started running almost every morning and I did hundreds of crunches everyday and I controlled my food intake and lost a few pounds. And then I stopped.

Surely I don't have to get really depressed to start working out again, right? The constant load stress that I go through now should be enough to push me. Yes. It should.

But for now, I'm gonna finish my chores, hit the showers and go to bed. Good night.

Candlesticks

I would like to think of myself as 'cultured' where food is concerned, that is. Don't think I have that much of knowledge about other things in the world. I do, however, have tasted quite a variety of food and is always on the look out for new things to eat. Which brings us to the second uh.. noun? and that is daring. Or adventurous. Especially where my taste buds are concerned.

I have a thing for food. Korean. Japanese. French. Italian. You name it. If it's halal then I am up for it. It's always exciting to try something new. I am still referring to food of course (now let's not get sidetracked).

For iftar yesterday I made the dish I had at Delicious last week - Smoked Salmon Angelhair tossed in Cream, served with Caviar and Parsley. I cooked it and it tasted pretty close to the one I had, slightly a bit salty as I put some extra caviar in it and a tad bit dry, because I was afraid I'd soak the pasta with cream (didn't want it to be heavy) - this is compared to the one they served over at Delicious but it tasted lovely anyhow. Mum made Aglio Olio Linguine with Shrimp and it tasted delightful. The chilli flakes, olive oil, garlic and basil blended really well and produced a fine yet simple meal. Pasta is such a simple dish. Next up would be Angelhair with Basil Pesto. I have a thing for Angelhair, because it's much lighter and easier to manage than spaghetti. I much prefer spaghettini than spaghetti if I have a choice but spaghettini is a little bit hard to find in this part of the world (as with Halibut) so I stick with Angelhair. Lovely lovely.

Anyhoo. Two days back I (finally!) had my kimchi with some calrose rice and Uncle Bob's chicken (bought from Bazaar Ramadan). Lovely. The kimchi was so strong (it was more than two weeks old) that Mum and Dad complained it being so smelly I had to eat it elsewhere. Hah ha.

I thought of fixing some caviar, hard-boiled eggs, diced onions and bleu cheese for supper but I realized I was way too bloated from the iftar earlier the evening. I think I ate too much. How can I not? There's so many types of food, choices! at home. You don't get that in college. There you just take what they offered.

Mum's eating Aglio Olio Linguine with Shrimp as we speak. She didn't get to eat much earlier, with all the fuss with the baby and everything. Poor boy got rash on his legs and isn't feeling so well. That little baby.

I should hit the sack now. Must be up early for the wet market, baking cookies, driving Mum and Rawsyad to the hospital and oh yeah, cleaning the house. Raya's not so fun this year. But ahh whatever.

Let's end with a fun note - some pictures of the adorable baby boy himself, all clad in Baju Melayu.

Ooh, and I'd like to take this opportunity to wish each and everyone of you a pleasant Eidulfitri, wherever you may be. Eid Mubarak everyone! Be safe :)


Love,
me.

The Day Tomorrow Came

I know you're busy doing all the things you always planned to do but remember, today is also the day that you kiss me.


(via I Wrote This For You)

Letters to Prague

Hi, how have you been? Did you miss me? I doubt you ever did. I've been alright, sitting here at this very desk watching the world move about from this very screen and I wonder how you're doing on the other side.

I've got nothing much to tell that I haven't told you already. Something happened, not so long ago and it got me worried everytime I think about it but I'm trying my best to stay calm, by distracting myself with other happy things. I pray that it will not continue further and will stay just that.

I had one of the best iftars in a very long time, with 11 loved ones last week. I had a lovely time and I hope you did too.

Oh, did I tell you that I finally bought Jamie Oliver's cookbook as well as Nigella's? Yes, indeed I have, along with two journals. Fantastic, all skulls and crossbones and everything. Unfortunately, I haven't the time to fill the pages as I've been busy with school and other activities and well, the words just won't come.

I cannot wait for Eid so that we can all feast on Mama's glorious cooking - ketupat palas, kari daging, nasi impit, kuah kacang, sambal sotong, kuah lodeh, laksa and of course 'em chocolate chip cookies and pineapple tarts. Ooh just the thought of it makes me drool.

By then, I'll be able to cook some food myself. I can't wait. I was thinking, dory baked fish topped with cherry tomatoes, mozarella and parmesan served with sauteed potatoes and rocket salad, just like the ones they serve at The Apartment :D And yesterday, I tried Chef John's (from Foodwishes) Summer Scrambled Eggs Recipe for break fast and it was scrumptious! I did however, replaced the fetta with Bega's Smokey BBQ sliced cheese as we didn't have any fetta. I might just resort to this from now on, a change from the usual plain American scrambled eggs. Major love! I even made it for sahur earlier today hah ha! You should definitely give it a try :)

In case you didn't know, I have recently discovered my love for cooking. First it's food, now cooking. I get all psyched everytime I talk about food and cooking stuff, hence the purchase of the two cookbooks. I would like to get started soon and boy I sure will. It's so much nicer and fun (funner?) when you get to fix these things yourself.

Anyway, I have to run now. I've got some chopping to do, of almonds and walnuts. It's been nice writing to you, whoever you may be, thank you for reading.

I'll talk to you soon, I hope (& I definitely will not wait for you to call me). Oh, did I mention that I miss you? Probably did. Anyways..

Till then.


Love,
me.

The Road Map

I missed you more than words and pictures can describe. But I'll try.


(via I Wrote This For You)